


Pray To Me

by KeepsakeKey



Category: Supernatural
Genre: M/M, Tumblr Fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-11-03
Updated: 2012-11-03
Packaged: 2017-11-17 16:33:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 634
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/553623
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KeepsakeKey/pseuds/KeepsakeKey
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Castiel put a piece of his Grace inside of Dean, but Dean had never realized just what that meant.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Pray To Me

**Author's Note:**

> This is a fanfiction based off of [this](http://keepsakekey.tumblr.com/post/34913781414/sometimes-i-wish-dean-could-hear-cas-prayers-too) Tumblr post.

Dean woke up one morning that was just like all the rest; his hand on the hilt of a blade, his back pressed against the headboard of a bed he didn’t stretch out on, his eyes snapping open with complete focus, not softened by the remnants of sleep, just the barest trickle of light from the rising sun pushing through the blinds of the motel, the soft snoring of Sam from the other bed.

It takes a few moments, like always, for Dean to relax his posture, letting his shoulders droop down, his eyelids fall shut warily. He isn’t in Purgatory anymore, doesn’t have to wake up at the drop of a hat in order to fight for his life. His hand aches from where it’s been gripping onto the handle of his knife, but he still doesn’t let go.

Benny isn’t with him, but Sam is, even though his brother hasn’t truly been with him since he got back at all. Part of him was still off with that girl, and though Dean had tried to be angry with him, he didn’t have it in him. If one of them could be happy, could have a normal life, then surely it should be Sam. It was Dean’s fault that Sam had gotten into the hunting life in the first place. If he had protected him better, shielded him harder…

Castiel wasn’t with him either, not really. Fingertips pressed against his chest, the fabric of his shirt keeping the digits from hitting flesh. There was some of Castiel’s Grace inside of his body, enough so that the angel would be able to find him again one day should he get out of Purgatory before Dean could find a way back.

Cas. One of Dean’s bigger regrets. He couldn’t save his angel, couldn’t pull him out of Purgatory. He could only imagine what Castiel was going through, running from the Leviathan, not to mention the other monsters that surely want a piece of him. After all, Dean had pissed off quite a few of them by killing them one by one in an attempt to find the angel.

A dry chuckle escaped his lips before he heard it.

_‘I hope that you’re okay. That you’ve reached Sam, that you found each other again.’_

For a moment, Dean thought that he might have finally snapped, finally lost it and gone insane, but his chest got hotter and he pulled down the collar of his shirt. The spot above his heart was glowing a soft blue.

“Cas?”

_‘I was right to let go of you. Pulling me through would have killed you. I’m not sorry that I did it. I’m sorry that I lied about it; I told you I would never lie to you again.’_

He knew the entire time. That he wouldn’t be getting out of Purgatory. Dean’s heart raced as he finally realized what he was hearing. Castiel was praying.

 _‘I can only hope that you can forgive me. No, even if you don’t, at least you’ll be alive. That’s all I need… Dean, I-‘_ The soft voice in his head cut off, the silence hanging in his mind before the added whisper. _‘Leviathan.’_

Then nothing.

No more whispers, no more apologies. No more anything.

Dean listened intently for a whole hour before pulling his knees up to his chest, dropping his forehead down onto one. His fingers stayed pressed against his heart, but the warm glow had faded away. Castiel had seemed to lose his own faith long before he got pulled into Purgatory. Even so, Dean had eventually found his own faith, in the form of an angel in a trenchcoat.

It had never occurred to Dean before. The one Dean prayed to was Castiel. But who has Castiel been praying to?


End file.
